


santa's little helper

by mihaly



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Christmas, Flirting, M/M, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-30
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-09-02 11:13:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16785841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mihaly/pseuds/mihaly
Summary: Buck and Eddie take Christopher to visit Santa and Buck has an epiphany.Takes place during s02e10 "Merry Ex-Mas"





	santa's little helper

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y'all!
> 
> This is kinda a combination between my need to explore Buck's reaction to the elf and @lucifermrningstr thoughts on what Christopher wished for from Santa.
> 
> Some of the dialogue is lifted directly from the show, so I don't own it! The rest is mine.
> 
> Enjoy!

It was Christmastime and the Grove was packed with tourists and locals alike, all breathing in the overwhelming festiveness of the outdoor mall. The trolley was adorned with garland and an oversized wreath on the front. The fountain was set to a routine of “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year”. And best yet, parking was only a partial nightmare.

Buck and Eddie walked through the crowd with Christopher in tow. There was only one reason they were braving the Grove tonight: Santa. As Christmas approached, Christopher was getting more and more excited about seeing the bearded character. Back in Texas, they saw Santa almost immediately after Thanksgiving. Eddie knew all the good spots to bring him where the line wouldn’t be too long and that Santa’s Workshop was handicap accessible. But in LA, he didn’t know where to go.

Eddie had mentioned it a few days earlier, how he kept having to work and didn’t want Carla to take him. He loved Carla, he really did, but this was a memory he wanted to have with his son. He said he was nervous about the crowds and what to expect.

At lunch, Buck did some secret research on his phone. After work, he went to three different malls to check out their Santa’s Workshops. He didn’t tell Eddie of his plan.

The next time it was brought up – well, when Buck casually brought it up in conversation – he was able to say for certainty that the Grove was the best choice.

When Eddie asked if Buck wanted to come with, he said yes before Eddie even finished his question.

He loved spending time with Christopher. He was funny and smart and so much like his dad. And Eddie… well, Eddie was Buck’s best friend. They gravitated toward each other and never left each other’s orbit. He was excited every morning to see Eddie at work. He felt lost when he’d call out sick and wasn’t around. It was becoming a growing habit that Buck would come over to Eddie’s after work to hang out.

He hadn’t met anyone he wanted to spend this much time with since Abby.

Suddenly, their meet-ups after work became less frequent, and Eddie became a little tenser at the firehouse. Buck wasn’t sure what that was about yet he desperately wanted to know if there was something he could do to make it better. He hated seeing Eddie like that.

Turns out, his estranged wife had reentered the picture.

That was fine, he guessed, but Buck had this uneasy feeling about her. He’d only seen her at the firehouse’s toy drive and Eddie did not look happy about it. When Buck found out they’d been sleeping together for the last two months, Eddie’s change in behavior suddenly made sense. It didn’t stop Buck from obsessing over it, mulling over his situation to figure out why it felt so wrong. On their way to Maddie’s, Chimney let him talk the whole drive about it. It didn’t make him feel any better.

Eddie hadn’t brought it up since the toy drive, and Buck wasn’t going to pry. He knew what boundaries to respect with Eddie. It was his problem to work out and it didn’t involve him. He didn’t have to tell Buck anything.

There was also a part of Buck that really did not want to hear about it. Even if Eddie wanted to talk about it, he didn’t want to know. He couldn’t explain it. So, Eddie’s silence on the matter was appreciated.

Going to the Grove, as much as it was a living nightmare every day of the year and somehow worse around the holidays, was a small sacrifice to pay to see Christopher with Santa and ease his mind about Eddie’s situation. It was just the guys: him, Eddie, and Christopher. He hadn’t felt this comfortable since before, well, since before Shannon arrived.

The car ride was full of them swapping stories about their past Christmases, remarks about the traffic, and of course singing with Christmas songs. It felt so normal yet special at the same time. He couldn’t stop smiling.

Once they arrived, they made a beeline for Santa’s Workshop because Christopher refused to go anywhere else first, including his favorite place, Barnes & Noble.

“Thanks again for coming along, Buck,” Eddie said as they walked through the throng of people.

“Aw, you know I’ll do anything if Christopher’s involved,” Buck said, squeezing Christopher’s small hand in his. Christopher beamed at him with his adorably goofy grin, his teeth just slightly too big for his mouth. Buck was sure if he found the right person he would want to settle down and have a kid just like Christopher.

The small boy walked beside him, a crutch in his opposite hand and Eddie carrying the other.

“Sorry we haven’t been spending as much time together lately,” Eddie said.

“Don’t sweat it,” Buck replied. “People get busy.”

Eddie chuckled. They both knew that wasn’t the reason.

“I’m glad I was able to come with you guys today,” he added. “It’s already the highlight of my week by far.”

“Santa!” Christopher said excitedly next to him.

Amidst the hut bursting with decorations, there was Santa on his great big chair, his lap currently occupied by an adorable pair of twin girls. It threw Buck back to the days his parents would take him and Maddie to see Santa, and how Maddie teased him when he got scared to sit in Santa’s lap.

“Oh, wow, look at this line,” Eddie remarked. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a line this short to see Santa.”

That was another thing Buck took into consideration. While the Grove was a popular place, it was miraculously less crowded on a Tuesday night after dinner.

“Huh, weird,” he said coolly as if he didn’t know that was going to happen.

They joined the line, only a handful of kids in front of them. Buck glanced around and spotted a small kiosk selling ornaments. He wanted to get a small gift for Christopher for their trip. (This wasn’t his only gift from him. Buck was planning to get him all the things off his wishlist that Eddie wasn’t.) If he was quick with his selection, he could be back in time to take pictures of Christopher with Santa.

“Hey, I’ll be right back, okay?” he said.

“Oh, yeah, sure.”

He stepped out of line and over to the kiosk. There were dozens of ornaments of different kinds. All the colors and designs were a bit overwhelming. He scanned over the lot and found a cartoonish dog wearing a Hawaiian shirt and sunglasses with a banner that said, “Best Christmas Ever”. Christopher was obsessed with dogs lately and was always making them stop so he could pet every single one. Buck knew he’d love it.

As he plucked it off its holder, he spotted one of a shirtless firefighter posing with an axe. It looked ridiculous, but it made Buck think back to when they met and how they were fighting over the calendar spot. He remembered the knot he felt in his stomach when Eddie took off his shirt the first time and how unfairly attractive he was. His cheeks got hot as he considered the physical differences between the Eddie and the ornament. The ornament didn’t have as nice a body as Eddie did. Eddie’s face was also way prettier. Also, only The Rock’s pecs could be that big.

He paid the cashier and carefully placed them into the inside pocket of his jacket.

When he turned around, he spotted Eddie sitting on the edge of the water fountain taking pictures of Christopher in line by himself.

“Why aren’t you up there with Christopher?” Buck asked as he sat down next to him.

“I offered to wait in line with him, but he said this was private,” Eddie answered before yelling, “Christopher!”

Christopher turned and looked at them and Eddie took several pictures. It was all severely cute.

“I really admire that kid,” Buck said. “I love the way he always wants to do everything on his own.” And he was only that way because his dad was raising him to be so fiercely independent.

Eddie laughed. His whole demeanor started to shift now that Christopher wasn’t with them and Buck could see the tension return to his face. He knew what was coming.

“So?” Eddie said. “Not gonna say anything?”

Yup. This.

“About what?”

Buck didn’t want to ruin their nice outing by talking about the person and situation that made him unreasonably queasy. It also wasn’t his place. If it were his place, he would tell Eddie to stop doing what he’s doing, tell Shannon to go back home, and let them live in LA in peace.

“You know what about.”

“I figured it was none of my business.”

“It’s not.”

“That’s what I’m saying,” Buck replied. If Eddie didn’t want to talk about it, he didn’t have to. He’d save Buck the pain of thinking about the woman who hurt his best friend.

“Just kinda happened, okay?” Eddie said defensively. “It’s not like I planned it.”

Why was he being so defensive? Buck wasn’t going to interrogate Eddie on his choice to have sex with his wife. It’s not like Eddie cheated on him or anything.

“Never said you did,” Buck said.

“I only even reached out to her because I needed her help getting Christopher into his new school.”

“That’s totally understandable.”

“And just kind of… ended up in bed.”

Buck had _been there_.

“Eh, things happen,” he said. “It’s not like you’re breaking any commandments. You guys are still married.” He wasn’t cheating on anyone to be with Shannon. Why was he feeling so guilty?

“Yeah.” Eddie paused. “I’m sneaking around behind my kid’s back with his mother.”

Oh, that was a new level Buck wasn’t aware of.

“Christopher doesn’t know?”

“I don’t know what he knows,” Eddie said. “These kids sense things, right?”

They looked over at Santa’s Workshop and saw two elves hoisting Christopher onto Santa’s lap. Christopher couldn’t have looked more excited.

“The other day I made her sneak out so he wouldn’t see her there.”

“You’re trying to protect your kid,” Buck said. “She ran out on him, right?”

Eddie paused for a moment. Buck could see the weight of the conversation on his shoulders.

“I ran out first,” he said. “I ran out on both of them. See, when Christopher was first diagnosed, I was in Afghanistan right at the end of my tour. Instead of going back home, I reenlisted. Told myself it was to pay the bills.”

“But you were running away too,” Buck said, trying to understand the situation.

“Yeah. But I got to pretend like it was for a noble cause, to serve my country. When Shannon broke? Nobody thought she was a hero. She just got called evil,” Eddie explained. He looked ashamed that he let people talk about her that way and Buck couldn’t blame him. Or her.

“And now she wants back in his life.”

“Yeah.”

“So why don’t you let her? Seems like she’s already back in yours.”

Shannon didn’t see the problem of them being seen together, so clearly her feelings on Eddie had warmed.

“That’s what’s got me confused. Are we doing it for Christopher or for me?”

There were a lot of emotions happening on Eddie’s face. It made sense if they were doing it for Christopher. Hell, Buck would do a lot for Christopher and he wasn’t even his kid. But doing it for himself? From what Buck saw at the station and the little interaction between them, Eddie didn’t seem to like her very much. The only thing Buck could think of was if he felt there was sort of obligation, that he didn’t want to look like a cheater but really wanted to have sex, or he was trying to deny something.

Buck wished he could help him figure that part out.

“Sex complicates everything,” Eddie said, defeated.

Buck laughed. Didn’t he know it.

“You said it, brother,” he agreed.

Just then, one of the elves was walking Christopher to the end of the ramp to exit. He was beaming ear to ear. Buck and Eddie both got up to meet him. Eddie’s whole demeanor changed.

“How’d it go, pal?” he asked his son excitedly.

“It went great!” Christopher answered.

“So, what’d you ask for?”

“Can’t tell,” Christopher said cheekily. “Santa said he’d work on it.”

“Oh, man…” Eddie groaned.

Buck laughed. The whole point of Santa, he learned as an adult, was so parents could find out what their kids wanted for Christmas without asking directly. Kids trusted a stranger in a red suit and beard before their parents. It didn’t work if Christopher was going to be mum on the whole thing!

“Let’s go!” Eddie said before hauling Christopher off the ground. Buck watched as they walked away toward the funnel cake stand, the kid laughing and making faces at Buck who couldn’t help but make faces back.

He was about to follow them before the woman in the elf costume spoke.

“You two have an adorable son,” she said adoringly.

 _Oh_ , Buck did not expect his heart to skip a beat at her comment.

“Um…” Buck began before pausing to consider his reply.

His gut reaction was to correct her, to tell her that Christopher wasn’t his kid, that he was just Eddie’s, because that was the truth.

But it was 2018, and it was very modern and kind of her to recognize that Christopher could have two dads.

Oh, Buck would love to be Christopher’s dad. He’d never met a kid he got along with so well, whose smile could light Buck up like, well, a Christmas tree.

And if he was Christopher’s dad, that would mean he and Eddie would be together.

The butterflies in his stomach flurried rapidly, their eruption into flight sending waves of joy through his body.

He would be Eddie’s partner and they’d be raising Christopher together. They’d go on family vacations, go to the beach, have quiet movie nights at home. They’d have Christmases together, creating their own traditions and Buck would absolutely spoil Christopher with all the gifts Eddie would allow him.

He’d wake up every morning next to Eddie – his _husband_ – and fall asleep with him every night. Oh god, he’d get to have _sex_ with Eddie. He could picture Eddie’s long eyelashes fluttering closed as Buck leaned in and kissed him, his soft lips pressed so familiarly against his own. He imagined running his palms over Eddie’s smooth skin, feeling the definition of his muscles as they got intimate. He smiled. Yeah, the ornament in his pocket would have nothing on his husband.

He’d spend every moment with him, learn all his stories, know all his habits. He would come home to Eddie and Christopher, his husband and his son.

He would love to be Christopher’s dad if it came with all that.

Buck finally looked up at the elf.

“Thank you,” he said before turning away from her.

He skipped off the small step, his head swirling with everything he imagined in that moment. He looked up to see Eddie and Christopher standing in the funnel cake line.

Christopher was still slung over Eddie’s shoulder, so he saw Buck approaching and made a face. Buck blew a raspberry and Eddie turned around.

“Hey, did that elf tell you what Christopher told Santa?” he asked.

“She did not, unfortunately,” Buck said with a sigh, gazing affectionately at the silly kid in Eddie’s arms. “Apparently elves are sworn to secrecy.”

Christopher laughed, and Eddie smiled.

“Why don’t you sit down with Buck and I’ll order the funnel cake?” Eddie asked Christopher.

“Okay!” was Christopher’s cheery reply.

Eddie set Christopher down on the ground and after he got his bearings, Buck guided him over to a small table to sit.

“I’m super excited for my funnel cake,” Christopher said with a big smile.

“Yeah, your dad told me how many you ate at the Texas State Fair last year,” Buck replied. “I’ll be honest, Christopher. Even I couldn’t eat that many and I’m like, a thousand times bigger than you.”

Christopher laughed. God, he loved that child’s laugh.

He looked over in Eddie’s direction and he was surprised to find him staring right back. Eddie smiled, his eyes filled with adoration as he watched his son fiddle with a string on his sleeve. Then his eyes shifted and met Buck’s. His expression never changed. Buck was filled with warmth from his head to his toes. Eddie had looked at him like that since day one, but never had it made Buck yearn for him like it did at that moment.

That look could be his forever.

Eddie was next in line and once he stepped up to the window, Buck leaned over to Christopher.

“Hey Christopher,” he said in a hushed voice. “What did you ask for from Santa? I know you wouldn’t tell your dad, but you and I are best buds and I can keep a secret just like that elf.”

“Promise you won’t tell my dad?” Christopher asked, his big eyes blinking behind his thick glasses.

“Pinky-promise.”

Buck held up his pinky for Christopher to take. The promise was sealed.

Christopher took a deep breath.

“Um, I told Santa I wanted the new Batman LEGOs and a pool and a new iPad and a million books and to see my mom,” he said, his voice barely above the din of the mall.

Buck had a feeling the last one was the big one of why he wasn’t going to tell his dad. That would’ve been difficult for Eddie.

“And,” Christopher continued, taking a big deep breath. “I want you to be my other dad and move in with my dad and me.”

All the air was knocked out of Buck’s chest.

“Oh?” he said. His throat was suddenly very tight. Christopher couldn’t have meant it the way Buck was hearing it. Kids had a funny way of expressing themselves sometimes and Christopher was not exempt. “Kind of like an uncle?”

“No, my other dad,” Christopher insisted. “Like, married to my dad and stuff. He’s really happy when you’re around.”

Buck was stunned. He had only had his realization merely minutes ago yet here’s Christopher, wishing for the same thing from Santa.

“Well, Christopher,” Buck said gently. “I hope Santa can bring you all of that.”

With a powdered funnel cake and approximately a thousand napkins in hand, Eddie arrived at their table.

“One funnel cake for you, sir,” Eddie said as he sat down. “Also, napkins because I know you will have more powdered sugar on you than in you when we’re done.”

Christopher laughed as he started to pull at the fried dough and Eddie began papering his son in napkins.

Buck reveled in how domestic this was. He pictured it: him and his husband taking their son to see Santa, then stopping for a snack before starting the long journey through the bookstore. Truly, the only thing different between fantasy and reality were rings on their fingers.

“Did Christopher tell you what he asked for from Santa?” Eddie asked, his eye alight with playful anticipation. He was back to his normal self around Buck and not the angst-filled shell of a man when he talked about Shannon.

“He did,” Buck answered as he ruffled Christopher’s hair. “But I was sworn to secrecy.”

Christopher nodded vigorously, sprinkling a hearty dusting of powdered sugar on his carefully arranged napkins. He was too busy paying attention to his funnel cake that he missed Buck mouth to Eddie, ‘I’ll tell you later.’

Eddie mouthed his thanks in return before helping himself to a piece of Christopher’s funnel cake.

* * *

Later, they arrived at the bookstore, Christopher’s favorite place in the world. He was a voracious reader and liked to post up in the kids’ section with a stack of books almost as tall as he was. Buck had been on more than enough bookstore and library trips with Christopher and Eddie to know the routine: walk row by row, pick out books, and stack them in rainbow order starting with red. They would then sit on either side of him, helping with words he didn’t know.

Once Christopher was settled with his third book, Eddie stood up.

“Hey Christopher, Buck and I will be right back,” he said to his son before his eyes darted to Buck who quickly got to his feet. “I’ve got questions about work.”

Buck had no idea what Eddie was talking about. What work questions?

“Okay,” Christopher replied, his nose still in his book.

Eddie gestured for Buck to step over toward the shelves with him. Christopher was still in their line of sight but out of earshot.

“So, what did he ask Santa for?” Eddie asked.

Buck chuckled. He should’ve realized.

“I’m afraid I can’t tell you that,” Buck said cheekily. “Been sworn to secrecy.”

“Buck…” Eddie pleaded. His dark brown eyes were his weapon of choice and Buck was always powerless against them.

“Okay, okay,” Buck said. “There are six things. A few are pretty easy. Batman LEGOs, a new iPad—”

“Okay, good, was planning on getting him one of those anyway,” Eddie interrupted.

“A pool—”

“Pool’s not gonna happen.”

“I don’t know, maybe an inflatable pool? He wasn’t specific.”

“Fair point.”

“A million books—”

Eddie chuckled.

Buck took a deep breath.

“And he wants to see his mom.”

Eddie sighed heavily.

“I had a feeling that was going to be one of them,” he said with a grumble. He sighed again.

“Yeah, he seemed pretty excited about it,” Buck said.

Eddie mulled over the list and counted on his fingers.

“That’s only five,” he remarked. “What’s the sixth one? Tell me it’s not that he wants us to get back together.”

“No, it’s not that,” Buck assured him.

“Okay, good. What is it?”

The bottom of Buck’s stomach dropped out. He forgot to subtract the last one. He could lie. Tell Eddie that he miscounted or tell him a different gift. But if Eddie happened to get that for him and it wasn’t what he asked for, Christopher would know.

“Um,” Buck said. “He, uh, he wanted me to move in with you guys?”

“I mean, you are a little homeless right now. It wouldn’t be the wildest idea,” Eddie said, chuckling. “And he loves spending time with you.”

Buck left out the most important part.

“Well, he also wants me to be his other dad?”

There was a gentle look of surprise that graced Eddie’s face. It was obviously not what he was expecting.

“His other dad?”

“Yeah.”

“Huh.”

Eddie seemed confused at Christopher’s request. The lack of a response made Buck very nervous. He couldn’t tell if Eddie was offended by the idea or upset or what.

“And so, like, I asked him if he meant like in a fun uncle sort of way. You know how people have their friends be uncles and stuff? But he said it was in an ‘us being married’ sort of way,” Buck said, trying to play it all off as some silly thing children say, but then his tone turned earnest. “You know, like, husband and husband.”

Eddie stared at him silently. He was clearly considering what Buck just told him, as his eyes danced around. Buck gulped. Not only did he betray the trust of the coolest kid he knew, but he more than likely ruined his best friendship. He wasn’t aware of how much he wanted Eddie until literally thirty minutes ago and now he felt on the edge of breaking if Eddie detested the idea. He didn’t want to ruin the best relationship he’d ever had by letting his heart get in the way.

“Crazy, right?” Buck said to break the silence. His voice stuck in his throat and his mouth felt very dry.

“I don’t think it’s crazy at all,” Eddie said softly, surely.

Buck leaned against the shelves, just taking Eddie in. He seemed so much more relaxed than Buck anticipated. He didn’t look weirded out or anything like that. His son just asked Santa if his dad and his dad’s best friend would get married, and here Eddie was gazing at Buck like he was seeing color for the first time. It made Buck’s heart race.

Eddie took a small step closer to invade Buck’s personal space. It would’ve been so easy to reach out and kiss him. His beautiful face was _right there_ …

“Does that bother you?” Eddie asked. “That he wants that?”

“No, not at all,” Buck said. “I actually wish it was the gift I could give him this year.”

“Well, I wish it was too.”

Did he mean…?

Buck stretched out his forefinger and cautiously ran the tip along the side of Eddie’s calloused hand. Eddie’s eyes widened at the touch. His hand turned and very easily slipped into Buck’s, their fingers lacing together. His hand felt so different from what he was used to, but he loved it. Their small intimate act was hidden from spectators against the bookshelves and shielded by their bodies. It wasn’t a show for Christopher or anyone else. It was just for them.

Buck was nearly shaking. His heart was thudding so hard in his chest he was sure Eddie could hear it. He had so many questions and thoughts racing through his head, like how long had Eddie been thinking about this and him? Was that part of the problem with Shannon? That he wasn’t sure if Buck liked him back, so he was moving on – or well, back? Or was he having the same realization as Buck tonight? That the idea of Buck being Christopher’s other dad was fantastic and wonderful?

The silence between them was deafening as both of them watched the other.

Buck needed to say something. Anything.

“Oh, um, I bought you a present,” Buck said.

He dug in his jacket with his free hand and pulled out the corny sexy fireman. Eddie laughed before taking the ornament gingerly from Buck.

“Reminded me of the first day we met,” he explained.

“Is this supposed to be you?” Eddie asked, amused.

“Oh! Um, sure, if you want it to be.”

“I do.”

Buck felt his cheeks heat up.

“I don’t know if it’s appropriate to hang on the tree,” Eddie continued, looking at the ornament. “But I’ll find a place for it.”

“I got one for Christopher too,” Buck said. “One that’s more tree-appropriate.”

“If it’s from you, he’s going to love it,” Eddie said, smiling softly at him. He squeezed Buck’s hand as a thank you.

“Dad!” Christopher called from his seat. “Need you!”

Christopher’s voice shook them out of their reverie and they quickly let go of each other’s hand. Couldn’t let him see and get his hopes up since neither of them quite knew what was brewing between them.

“I’ll be right there, Christopher,” Eddie said, just turning his head to his son. He turned back and looked at Buck. Buck smiled.

“We’ll talk later,” Buck said.

“Definitely,” Eddie said quietly. He hesitated and looked back at Christopher who was nose-deep in a book, then at the ornament in his hand. Then, in an act of bravery, he leaned up and kissed Buck softly on the lips. It was so delicate and fleeting that Buck could’ve imagined it. But he could feel the ghost-like lingering touch of Eddie’s lips on his, so he knew it was real.

He gave Buck a shy smile before going to Christopher, leaving Buck desperate for more. There was a long conversation ahead of them, but Buck was ready. He looked across the room to Eddie and Christopher and imagined how that could be his life too. It made him so unbelievably happy.

He had no idea a small trip to visit Santa would result in such a life-altering realization.

Eddie was right; kids really can sense these things.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! You can follow me on tumblr @davidrosesfiance


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